Each week, on Wednesday, the Hersband & I write letters to each other. She calls them “Love Reports”. They are basically a recap of the week’s events, highlights, lowlights & occasional sweet nothings.
I got the idea from a book I read 3 years ago. It wasn’t a great book, but gave us a great idea, in it an older couple had passed away and their children found boxes of letters their parents had exchanged over decades. We didn’t start our letters so that our children might find them. For us the letters are more an effort at better communication & memory keeping.
October 12, 2011- “We moved all that lumber by the house and found 27 scorpions, 4 frogs, 2 salamanders and a horny toad! You kept squealing and jumping around. Took us forever to move that lumber, but now the yard will look good for our pumpkin party!”
December 14, 2011 – “We got married! You are officially my beautiful, sexy wife. God, I love saying that. Thank you My Love for marrying me. I am a very happy Hersband. Provincetown was unbelievable. I have never been to a place like that. We were able to walk the streets holding hands. It was so freeing.”
February 6, 2012 – “Couple of weeks ago we tried for a baby, no go. So you are taking pills to make your eggs come to life or something…and we also got a shot that I’m supposed to give you after we go to the doctor. I really hope that you can still be happy with me even if we can’t have a baby.”
April 11, 2012 – “We went to the doctor today. We had to wait one hour, but it was worth the wait to see what is growing in your body. Not only is there one healthy baby, but there are TWO! The heartbeats are strong. You couldn’t stop crying, you are so happy! Oh man, this is real…I think a list is in order so hopefully we won’t be overwhelmed. This is something. I love you and I thank you for your love. I’m so glad you are my wife and my babies’ Momma.”
January 9, 2013 – “I know you are tired. I am tired. Being a parent is exhausting. We need to learn to talk better to each other though when we are tired. I think we need a schedule too, for the babies for feeding them and who will get up and all that. This is hard.”
March 13, 2013 – “Your dad died today and I am just so sorry. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what I’d do without my dad. I know ya’ll had a different relationship than me and my dad. It’s not the same. I’m sorry. I’m really glad we took the girls to meet him a few weeks ago.”
September 18, 2013 – “Our first overnight trip away from the babies! Pops & Nana kept the girls and we went to see Wicked and to the State Fair! It was awesome. We spent a lot of money at the fair. It was fun, but maybe we need to look at that budget thing you did again this week. I know you said we are fine. I trust you. We did buy a lot of Christmas presents. We need to do this more often. Not the spending but the overnights!”
Our goal is to write every Wednesday, but I have to admit, this past year has been rather busy and we are lucky to write every other Wednesday. Sometimes it’s a post-it note, or even a scrap of paper, but sometimes a long, beautiful, rambling letter. We state our complaints, compliments, frustrations and fears to each other in those letters.
We keep them in a big wooden box that D made for me one Christmas. The box is almost full already and I feel we’ve only just begun! 3 years of Love Reports down and a lifetime to go. She better get to making more boxes! I’ll remind her in the next letter.
To see what my blogging friends wrote in response to this writing prompt go here.
I absolutely love this post. What a beautiful tradition and a beautiful family you have. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Heather!
DeleteI have never heard of anyone doing this before, and I think it is a lovely thing. In fact, I'm a little jealous. A couple years ago, I reread all the letters I'd written to my husband before we were married. It almost felt like spying even though the letters were mine. Those from him are easier to sort because there is only one. I'd love to institute your tradition, but know it would never happen at my house. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteYou never know Cynthia, we weren't sure we could keep it up either. Sometimes it's a Thursday or even Friday before one of the notes is given. Mine are usually written in stolen minutes between cooking or while supervising homework. D carries a notebook in her lunchbox to work and writes short entries here and there over the course of a few days. Hers really does resemble more of a weekly report or diary.
DeleteI can imagine you re-reading those letter to your husband! I loved looking through ours to grab the quotes I used above.